Written by: Jaimie Johnson, certified doula (DONA), Lamaze childbirth educator (LCCE), & prenatal yoga teacher (RYT-200)
Not only does praying help to regulate my nervous system as I’m supporting you, but it truly works. God hears us. He answers us. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve prayed for things to shift and they do. There have also been many times where I have prayed and I’ve felt ignored too. I know you have too. Sometimes our prayers don’t get answered in the way we’d hoped in that moment, but I still believe our prayers truly matter. Just because we don’t see or understand the bigger picture right now, doesn’t mean he doesn’t have good plans for us.
I’m not the best at praying for my boys often. I pray for my own sanity and that I would love them well, but I don’t often pray specifically for them and I am so embarrassed to admit that. I don’t remember what sparked this in me, but this week I decided to get out a book I had started years ago and never finished, called “Praying for Boys,” by Brooke McGlothlin. For several nights a week, I have read her take on a trait that boys need and then insert their names into the scriptures she’s written into prayers.
It started out feeling very awkward and kind of pointless. But last night, as Grant was about to go to bed, I decided to awkwardly pray over him in an area he’s struggling with. I prayed something along the lines of “God help Grant be kind to others & obey his parents because it is honoring to you.” When I finished this short prayer, it actually felt good and he didn’t react negatively like I worried he might!
When I gave him a hug and kiss goodnight and told him to go say his prayers before he went to bed, he asked “why?,” genuinely curious. In that moment, I realized two things. One, that if my child really has to ask why he should say prayers before bed, we’ve got some major work to do - yikes! Two, that this is such a simple opportunity for us to continue growing closer to God & connect with one another at the same time.
The next day, me & my 2 older boys went on an evening walk to see the full moon and on the way home, I boldly prayed aloud again as I held their hands and they actually added things on to pray over when I finished! It seriously just made my heart smile so big!
I tell you this story, because prayer matters, and starting during pregnancy not only helps to better prepare you for birth, but creates a lasting habit for your family!
Praying over your birth
Prayer is such a powerful part of birth prep and your birth experience. It’s honestly one of my favorite things to do as a doula and I often do it throughout your pregnancy & labor without you even realizing it. Sometimes I’ll send prayers through audio messages during your pregnancy. Sometimes I’ll close my eyes with my hands on you at your birth when you’re navigating through a challenging part of labor. Sometimes I’ll pray aloud. But often, when you’re laboring on the toilet with the lights off & door closed, I’ll be waiting right outside the door praying. When you’re pushing, I’m praying in between the encouragement I’m giving. When I am driving to support you or driving home, I’m praying over your family.
Why should you pray?
What does the bible say about prayer? Although I didn’t dig deep into the research here, from a quick google search, it says there are 650 distinct prayers found throughout scripture, with Jesus’ personal prayers being a part of this. Jesus himself prayed to God the father. He went off by himself to pray. He prayed in despair. He prayed in gratitude. He prays for others, even those who chose to put him to death. He teaches others to pray.
This right here tells me that prayer is important. I know this. I pray when I wake up, when I go to sleep, and when I’m struggling throughout the day. But, most of my prayers are pretty surface level instead of true connection with God, and I’m willing to bet that most of yours’ are too.
I’m wondering what would happen if I committed to a deeper prayer life for the last two month of this year as I prepare to celebrate Jesus’ birth? What would happen if we all did that?
Here are some practical ways I will be doing this.
4 Practical Ways to Deepen your Prayer Life during Pregnancy & Motherhood
Daily Meditation Practice
It’s hard to get deep with anyone when we are so distracted in the fast pace of this world. It’s hard to feel and be seen when we are so quick to numb. I have noticed this about myself. When things feel hard, I scroll. I avoid. I numb. Sitting in stillness for just 3-5 minutes each day, especially before praying is an opportunity to learn to sit in the uncomfortable and begins to create space for you to truly listen.Prayer Journal
Writing is such an easy way for me to express my thoughts, but simply writing out short prayers doesn’t help me get deeper. So, not only am I writing out my prayers, but I’m working towards writing whatever is on my mind, for 3 pages whole pages, every day. This practice is adapted from Julia Cameron’s book, Artist's Way. Like meditation, it allows your mind to get into a flow, sit with the uncomfortable and push past the surface level thoughts.Praying Aloud with Family
I am a verbal processor so when I speak prayers out loud, it often leads me to things I didn’t even realize I was thinking. Similiarly to writing, when my thoughts are unleashed through speaking, the blocks often flow and the awkwardness fades away. It also allows my family to see what prayer can look like and hear scripture and truth spoken over them so they begin to internalize it as well.Tracking Prayers & Answers
There’s a space in the front of my favorite planner (you can get 10% off at this link) with a space to record prayer requests & praise reports and I’m going to start using it and reflecting back each month on how God is answering my prayers. We know that he answers, but it really solidifies that when we can see it right in front of us! There is also a section at the beginning of each month to write down prayers! If you haven’t seen Prayerful Planners - you MUST check them out!
